Heat, weddings and proposals

Two days into my India visit, I am still fighting jet lag, heat and the inevitable attacks on my waistline.  This time around, managing jet lag and the heat seems much easier, while the attacks on my waistline have been particularly aggressive.

My schedule  for the last few days has  looked like this:

Day 1:  Attend 1st death anniversary of uncle (it’s a kind of remembrance event which felt like a family get-together).  Meet all relatives, dine on six course feast.

Day 2:  Morning – Death anniversary ceremony of R’s grandma.  More family get-togethers,  six-course meals.  Evening:  Wedding reception of cousin’s cousin.

Day 3:  Morning- Wedding of cousin’s cousin.  Evening – Cousin’s Engagement.

I am not sure what has been planned for Day 4.   I’m sure, though, that someone is naming their new baby/ moving into a new house/celebrating their kids graduating second grade  or whatever it is they throw six-course feasts here for.

These events, though, come with their moments of peril.  Or should I say, pure hilarity.

There was, for instance, this old man who walked up to my mother in law and began a conversation.

“Are there any unmarried daughters in your house?” he asked her.  This, as we all know, is the standard manner of greeting strangers at a wedding or any other social gathering.

“No,” said my mother in law baldly.

He ignored this.  Clearly, she was bluffing.  Perhaps, he thought she was blowing him off.

“It’s not just any match,” he assured her. “I am talking about a very good guy. He works in TCS. ”  He paused for effect.  “He is an MBA.  They are very seriously looking for a match for him.”

I was standiing nearby, not paying much attention.  Typical Indian scene, right?  Get three people together and soon they start discussing wedding proposals.

And then my mother in law turned to me and silently mouthed “He is talking about you.”

Oh.  A marriage proposal for me?  This was getting very interesting.

I decided to pay more attention now.  He was going on about how wonderfully good natured the guy was.  But here is what is interesting – “works abroad” never came up.  Once upon a time, you could not say “TCS” without adding “has visited US several times”.  As if what you are really looking for in a husband would be the ability to push mountains of suitcases through customs.

These days, clearly, working abroad is not that desirable ?  Or perhaps not even worth mentioning and taken for granted?

But anyway,  TCS, MBA.. sounds terrific, right?  I think I will call R tonight and ask him what he thinks of the match 😛


16 thoughts on “Heat, weddings and proposals

  1. No harm in going on the usual ‘chalo mil lete hain’ date and letting the waistline bear something more at someone else’s expense.. whilst you could say watch a movie too and etc etc… No? 😉
    Maybe call R and ask him if he would accompany you as a ‘good friend’ 😛

  2. So good for the ego!
    Some of us had gone to see off a friend at a railway station, many years ago. One Uncleji had a proposal for one of my friends, who was already a mother of two! Most flattering:)
    Enjoy the feasting, and perhaps some more proposals!

  3. lol at the proposal..and that too in front of the M-in-law…
    @maxdavinci you are right on the foreign tag…even US does not elicit much interest these days..

  4. I read the post yesterday and as if on cue, this morning:

    The phone rang. I picked up. One Indian Uncle-ji asked for me. Then he said his name is so-and-so and he was calling from a European country, and that he got my number from an Indian client of mine. I asked, “What can I do for you?” He said, “My daughter, she is an MBA, her name is Blah-Blah, she works in ABC Bank in London. You understand she is very aggressive about her career. So our mutual friend said you will know some appropriate type of boy for her.”. I was stumped. Then I said I am afraid I do not know any single men. “Oh, well it is worth asking anyone,” he added cheerily and hung up.

    I am still recovering from that “it’s worth asking anyone” business. She lives in London. Does he know what all she must be getting up to? Should I have told him?

    With all the information he gave me about her, I located the girl on LinkedIn and Facebook in seconds. I am wondering if I should say “hello” or leave her alone.

    Given that for the said client, I am raising growth capital, this matchmaking seems a tangential diversification into growth of a different kind. Should I consider it?

    • It’s amazing how willing people are to ask random people about matrimonial leads (and how willing people are to give tbem too.) It feels like all of India (or each community) is one huge matrimonial network – and a very successful one too, just in terms of making unlikely people find each other 😀

  5. It is said that a person finds what s/he seeks.

    westerners often denigrate other cultures, thereby seeking to compensate their inherent feelings of inadequacy. Indians coming under western influence sometimes do likewise. That is not to suggest that such is necessarily the case here, merely an observation.
    Such people, when they visit India seek to find incidents that validate their pre-concieved notions. Seeking to find ‘uncles’ and ‘aunties’ who peddle matrimonial alliances, they do so. Those who seek to find cows roaming the streets, monkeys in temple compounds, find fulfilment. Those who seek to find ‘slumdogs’, do so.

    What is often missed out is that these are not what bharata desh is really all about, but merely the self-fulfilling prejudgements of individuals.

    Those seeking to realize themselves do so too in this land.


  6. Pingback: Heat, weddings and proposals | The Imagined Universe | Wedding Blog

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